cait collins

**this hair** I phone mark: "I have a dentists appointment today and I need a ride." "what's the matter with your van?" "I don't want to drive I am pissed off." "whatta bout?" "it has all come down to necessity and insanity." "what has?" "well, days ago when I was with you you refused to shave your balls and now I have this hair this hair stuck like a root between the bottom two front teeth and it mostly sticks out like a prickly pine needle in back toward the under- part of my tongue my tongue can not pry it loose no matter whichway I flick it and I am fanatical!" "have you tried dental floss?" "the dental floss holder is empty but I did try sewing thread sawing back and forth up and down infront inback and in between and it still don't budge." "whatta bout brushing?" "I have --- over and over and over with a tooth brush called reach and it didn't --- fuck!" "o o.k., I'll be right over." I pull a long strand of hair from the side of my head slide it in the slit between the bottom middle teeth tug back and forth nothing moves so I try the tip of a nail file scratch scrape and stab myself in the gum I hold my mouth in my hands and gurgle bloody obscene sounds and I throw the nail file into the toilet. I rinse my mouth with lukewarm water jut my bottom jaw forward and look into the mirror and and and that hair was still stuck still. mark was here lickity split laffin down the hall- way all the way to the bathroom. "man, mark I am sick of dickin' with this pubic hair and I ain't ever again suckin your balls unless you shave em first!" "I brought my electric tooth brush, try this and. haHahahaHAhaha .I'll see what else I can find." I flip the bird as he walks off to someplace else and I switch it on and watch myself in the mirror as the brush buzzes and whirrs around I stop and look and now the pube is stuck out to the front like like like A BUSH! mark was back and doesn't stop laffing. "stop being a dickhead what do I do now?" "let me operate." he squeezes lifts my chin til my mouth opens wide inside his palm and he looks in close and he picks and clicks and pricks in between my bottom teeth and I roll my eyes to the ceiling sky finally he snatches that little pubic hair with a pair of tweezers and I kiss him. he kisses me back on the nose tosses the culprit down the toilet. "hey, that was kind of arousing." he said, ".let's go to bed." and I said. "cancel the dentists appointment first."

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