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Belinda Subraman

My Indian In-laws


I remember India:

palm trees, monkey families,

fresh lime juice in the streets,

the sensual inundation

of sights and smells

and excess in everything.

I was exotic and believable there.


I was walking through dirt

in my sari,

to temples of the deities

following the lead

of my Indian in-laws.

I was scooping up fire with my hands,

glancing at idols that held no meaning for me,

being marked by the ash.


They smiled at the Western woman,

acting religious, knowing

it was my way of showing respect.

It was an adventure for me

but an arm around their culture for them.

To me it was living a dream

I knew I could wake up from.

To them it was the willingness

to be Indian that pleased.

We were holding hands

across a cultural cosmos,

knowing there were no differences

hearts could not soothe.

They accepted me

as I accepted them,

baffled but in love

with our wedded mystery.

                                                                               

                                                                                     

Indian Pop


I've been thinking a lot about you lately

and our last visit in '94,

long before the tsunami

ripped the Indian shores.

You were always watching to see

if I would be judgmental of Indian ways

but you saw me in awe of everything.


In Chennai, then Madras,

you took me inside the temples,

smiled and called me an honorary Hindu.

Sudha had draped me in a sari

and my forehead was dotted with kum-kum.


By '98 divorce had forced an ending

to our relationship

Indian Pop, you are gone from me

if not from this world.

I am thankful to have been

your honored guest

and your humble daughter- in-law.

Your sweetness lives on in my heart.



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Thunder Sandwich #26 - Summer/Fall 2005